Rules for Life
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Who has ever heard the saying: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”?
I’m guessing that we have shared this sentiment a few times in our lives (or had it said to us!) And yet, no matter how confident we may have sounded and no matter how much we may have wished it to be true, we likely walked away with pain from words.
A lesson we learn in life (and it doesn’t take too long to figure this out) is that – words are powerful and can lift up or tear down. They can mend a broken heart or create a broken heart. Sometimes the wounds created by words are difficult to heal. Words can stick with a person much longer than a broken bone. They can affect all parts of our selves. And words can and do divide us- in our personal relationships, in our relationships with others in the greater society, and in our relationships with others in the Church. And as we look at our passage in Ephesians today, we can tell it was the case for the church in Ephesus, as well.
While we don’t know the specific arguments among the Christians in the Ephesian church, we do know that there had been tension throughout the early years of the Church between Jewish Christians and Gentile Christians because of their many differences:
theological beliefs and faith practices
what they ate and what they wore
their native languages
world-views
ethnic and cultural backgrounds
Outside of the Church, these differences were what kept Jews and Gentiles separate. And as Jewish and Gentile Christians began to worship together within the Church, it was quite difficult for them to reconcile all of this and fully embrace one another (as Christ teaches).
We can understand now why the tension was so high and why there was fighting. They couldn’t figure out how to be equal.
All of this fighting and tearing down is not the way God intended the Church to be. Throughout the first three chapters of his letter to the Ephesians, the author explains that though the Gentiles were at one time “far off… they are no longer strangers and aliens, but are citizens with the saints and also members of the [same] household of God.” In Christ we are ONE.
Paul pleads with the Ephesian Christians at the beginning of chapter 4, just before our reading for today: “As a prisoner of the Lord, I beg you,” he says, “to lead a life worthy of the calling to which you have been called… making every effort to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace… For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to the one hope of your calling, one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of ALL, who is above all and through all and IN all.”
“So then,” Paul continues in our passage for today. “Let us put away falsehood, let all of us speak the truth to our neighbors, for we are members of ONE ANOTHER.”
As it was back then and is now—living out our faith is not always an easy task. But we must do it. Our faith should affect our life. What’s going on inside must be lived on the outside.
Earlier in the service we read/sang Psalm 130: This psalm expresses deep longing for God's mercy, reminding us of our need for God's grace as we strive to live out our faith. John Wesley, the founder of Methodism, emphasized personal holiness, social justice, and the work of the Holy Spirit. All of this is right in line with Ephesians' call for living out our faith with love—and building a loving community based in unity.
In Ephesians we are given some rules for living…Rules that are meant to bring us abundant life.
Speak the Truth:
Paul begins by urging truthful communication. Truth-telling isn't about avoiding lies; it's about fostering genuine relationships built on trust and transparency. Truth is the foundation of authentic relationships. When we speak truth, we build trust, foster understanding, and create a space for genuine connection.
Less Anger:
Anger is a natural human emotion, but it can be destructive. Paul doesn't say to suppress anger, but to keep it in check. Anger can move us to be agents of needed change but it also has the power to destroy relationships. Let’s keep it in check!
Positive Talk
Words are powerful tools. They can build up or tear down. Words filled with - bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander - is no good for the community or for our relationships. Choosing words that build up is like planting flowers in a garden - creating beauty and life.
Be Kind and Forgiving
Kindness is like sunshine on a cloudy day. It warms the heart and lifts the spirit. Forgiveness is like releasing a captive bird. It sets us free from the chains of bitterness and resentment. Kindness is sometimes overlooked but it is powerful.
Imitating God:
The ultimate goal is to reflect the character of God in our lives. This involves cultivating love, kindness, tenderness, and forgiveness – qualities often in short supply in our world. Imitating God is no small task.
We often think of rules as restrictive, limiting our freedom. But what if rules were actually a clear way for us to make the most of our time? What if they were the GPS guiding us to a life of joy, fulfillment, and abundant purpose? The rules laid out in Ephesians –although they sound quite “preachy” --rather than confining us, open up a world of possibility and meaning. By embracing truth, love, and holiness, we can become agents of transformation in our world.
Living out these rules—and our faith isn’t always easy. It requires constant practice and growth. We will stumble, we will fall. But each time we get back up and try again, we’re moving closer to the abundant life God desires for us.
The inspiring youth and adults on Bike trip this year gave me a glimpse of what it could look like for us – as the Church – to be imitators of God, living in love, embracing that we are members of one another, and speaking the truth. I saw a glimpse of this as we communed together around Jesus’ table and as we raised our voices in the dark, singing Lord, Prepare me to be a sanctuary, pure and holy, tried and true, with thanksgiving; I’ll be a living, sanctuary for you. Indeed--Therefore be imitators of God. Amen